Sweet are the uses of Motherhood

Much in the news yesterday was the story of (Democratic Representative) Tammy Duckworth’s attempt to vote by-proxy, and (House Minority Leader) Nancy Pelosi’s refusal to allow it.

Pelosi’s response was the classic answer we have all heard at some point or other in our elementary school careers.

Simply put (and paraphrased), Pelosi said:

Rules are rules.

If I let you do it, then everybody will want to. And we can’t have that, now, can we?

Sounds fair enough.

What makes Pelosi’s decision notable, of course, is the fact that Duckworth is a grown-up. Oh, and the fact that Representative Duckworth is pregnant.

Eight months pregnant.

Oh, and also, she is an amputee. A double-amputee.

It probably also bears mentioning that Duckworth, this woman, this state Representative, who happens to be eight months pregnant, and who happens to have lost both of her legs, did – in fact – lose them fighting for her country.

And, though this clearly does not affect the firm reality that “rules are rules,” some people (not Pelosi, obv) might find it relevant that Duckworth’s request (to vote by-proxy) stemmed from the fact that she was medically advised not to travel.

So, when you combine all these facts to look at the big picture, it only makes sense that Pelosi eyed Rep Duckworth with some suspicion…

Women like this (Duckworth) are inherently suspect.

So, here, on behalf of Nancy Pelosi – and all the people in positions of authority who find themselves faced with similarly non-motivated to work Pregnants – I submit several reasons to hold firmly to your position:

1. She’s faking it. Yes, the pregnancy, the amputation(s), the doctor’s note… all of it.
2. Had her work ethic been really strong, she wouldn’t have gotten pregnant in the first place.
3. If she really was committed to her job and to this vote, as she claims, she would have timed the pregnancy/delivery so that it was done and over already.
4. She’s milking it — I mean, eight months… Hasn’t this pregnancy gone on long enough?
5. By being a double-amputee and then going on to get pregnant didn’t she, in essence, agree to join the revolution and Opt-Out?
6. There’s no delicate way to say this. She’s lazy.
7. Finally, and this is a relatively minor point – but my mother had a baby once, and she held-down two jobs all the way through the pregnancy and labor, and only clocked-out once, for 7 minutes, to push the baby out, then clocked back in for overtime, and then went home to shovel snow out of our neighbor’s driveway while making breakfast. And my mother’s a double-amputee, Iraqi veteran too.

 

 

“Did you want a side of safety with that?”

The only thing that brought me some small measure of comfort in leaving my brand-new baby with strangers each day to go to work, has been my belief in the safety of the daycare center.

It’s pretty hard for a new mama to work when she can’t stop worrying about whether her baby is safe.

So, I picked the safest place I could find.  It’s a pretty fancy spot, complete with cameras and continuous online updates submitted by her caregivers via ipad.

It also costs a grip.

In fact, I am pretty much spending all my earnings on childcare for my two girls.

So, imagine my delight this morning when I read that there is only one fact that the President and the GOP can pretty much agree on:  child safety in federally-subsidized daycares…

Namely, who cares?

Because this is America.

And if you do not care enough about your own kids’ safety to fork over your entire paycheck for daycare, then why should that be government’s problem?

Physical Recovery: The Pac-Man of Maternity Leave

 

My friend just had a baby. She is in the hospital.  More accurately, she has been returned to the hospital. My friend is now in the ICU.

My friend gave birth last week, and now she is in the ICU…  After giving birth, she ended up with a subdural hematoma.  And now, while her baby sleeps at home watched by grandma and grandpa, my friend sleeps in the ICU. Watched by her husband.

And all I can think about is what this is costing her.

Not in terms of money. In terms of time.

You see, the clock started running down on her Maternity Leave the day her baby girl exited her womb.  And, now – this precious time my friend is spending in the ICU. This time eats away at every precious minute she will get to spend with her baby before she goes back to work.

She could spend the next 10 weeks recovering from the brain surgery she just underwent, and if, on day 10 weeks plus one her doctor declares her fit, it is time to get back to work. An entire Maternity Leave wasted. On recovering.

Will her employer care about the time she lost? Will her employer care that she was unfairly cheated out of the precious, precious time she needed with her newborn because her physical recovery was not completed within the standard 48 hours allocated for that purpose? Will they care at all that she unable to spend much of her “Maternity Leave” acclimating to her new role, introducing herself to her new infant because childbirth left her, by any definition of the term, severely physically injured?

I happen to know that they will not.

How do I know? I know, because I worked for the same company she does.

Something has to change.